No.No.No.

No, I am not saying that to you this time :) I am saying it to thrush and the agony that goes along with it. When you received antibiotics for your ear infection I asked the doctor if we would be "in for it" again and she thought since we were just down to nursing once or twice a day that it wouldn't be enough time to actually spread the nastiness. Well she was wrong. You have a spot on your cheek and I have it worse than ever. I could barely fall asleep. And normally, I would nurse through it but now, you have enough milk stored up to where you don't have to depend on me for it. So this morning, your dad made a bottle and gave it to you. And I laid in bed wondering if I had already experienced our last nursing session and I thought about yesterday morning and how nice it was to cuddle you up and nurse you back to a little nap before we had to get up for the day. But then I remembered the biting and remembered that you DIDNT fall back asleep, instead you crawled all over the bed and played... and that this had been happening all week and our last sweet session was probably weeks ago. I just don't know how to feel about it quite yet. I feel more free yet sad about such independence. I am excited for you and your growth, but wonder how much growing is going to take place and just how fast... So I have gone all day without nursing or pumping and feel fine. Last night I felt soooo sore I broke the pump BACK OUT and pumped enough to feel a bit better. Thrush + weaning+first birthdays+hormones = a very sad mommy!

You want to know how you feel about it? Just fine! (except around 4 when you are cuddling me up after daycare and try to pull my shirt down...hahaha..but I give you lots of kisses and cuddles instead and you forget)

I hope we both feel better soon! We have a party to plan!

love, mom

P.s When I picked you up from daycare yesterday I held you in my arm as I scooped up your daycare bag. As quick as can be, you stole your pacifier and lovey right out, and snuggled into my body. It was like you were saying, "Ok, mom, I had enough play time with my friends. I need mama cuddles now." And we did :)